So today was the first day back to school for the schools in our parish. My oldest started 4th grade and my youngest started 1st grade. I can't believe how fast time goes by! All day today I've seen posts from friends about their babies growing up and moving into higher grades, some starting kindergarten...and some (like my niece) starting high school. One of our favorite babysitters is moving away to start college this weekend, we are surely going to miss her being around here to be a great influence on our kids.
That word "influence" is one that has been weighing on my heart heavily the last few weeks. To preface, I will share with you a decision that Richard and I made when the kids were very little that I absolutely regret. We bought TV's for their bedrooms. Not only did we buy TV's, we allowed cable television to be hooked up to these TV's. Now, on our behalf, we set parental controls on both TV's and blocked channels that we deemed inappropriate for the content they shared. They pretty much had only channels that were pushed as "children" or "family" channels. Unfortunately, this allowed a separation of viewing between Richard and I and what the kids were watching. I will be the first to admit, this was totally a decision made out of convienience and laziness. I rationalized many of the times that it allowed us to watch shows that we wanted to watch and the kids got to watch those silly children's shows that drive me crazy, each in the comfort of our own private areas. How easy it is for me to look back now and see all of the time that has gone by that we have missed out on quality family time shared together doing something much more important. In addition to that, I am coming to grips with the fact that many of the shows that are passed as "family" or "children" shows provide much more information and education than I am prepared to explain at this point to my children. None of the shows on today compare to the shows that were on when I was a kid. I can remember watching Cosby or Who's the Boss together as a family and rarely if ever being exposed to a topic that wasn't appropriate for everyone. Pretty much, if a show was on before 8pm, it was ok for the entire family to watch. It's a sad day when my 6 year old can't watch a show on Disney at 4pm and be exposed to teens kissing and talking about dating or any other number of topics that are just too much for her to have to learn about right now. I think over the last few months especially, thanks to school being out for the summer, I have seen the dependency on television to entertain themselves. Rachel feels that she must watch TV at night to fall asleep. They know when a show is coming on that they really want to watch and know how to set their DVR to record it. Their interests in shows are totally different, with Brian wanting to watch more of the "action" type shows and Rachel wanting more of a sitcom type show.
So anyway, coming back to my point...I have been feeling very convicted about the amount of time we spend in the house at the same time, but not together...and also about the quality and quantity of television that the kids are exposed to each day. I never thought of us as "that family" that doesn't communicate and is so trapped into technology that we forget there are even other people in the home, but my eyes are being opened to the fact that we are absolutely headed in that direction if we don't make some changes fast. So, after prayer and consideration, we made the decision to eliminate the television being watched in the kid's bedrooms during the week. Now, trying to explain this to them and let them know that this was not a punishment, they've done nothing wrong, was the hard part. Brian seemed to take it in stride, but for Rachel, it's been a very hard task. As a trade-off of sorts, we've allowed them to have music at night when they go to bed, all of which is Christian or songs that we've approved. It's not open radio, just CD's, so the content is controlled. They can also read books, which Brian seems to be more excited about.
Now, I am not misleading myself into thinking that this is going to keep my kids from growing up, or finding out about things that I'm not ready for them to know about, but I do feel that it is an important step in protecting them from the elements that Satan has put out there to attack them. My greatest fear is for them to be exposed to something that they think we have approved that totally counters everything we've taught them to believe in. I know to some people this may seem like a silly or useless decision, but as a parent that is trying to teach my children Christian values, I feel very convicted and led to make this move. Will it keep my babies..babies? No. Does this make us perfect parents? Absolutely not. But it will allow Richard and I to be the biggest influence in their lives at home, as it should be, rather than Hannah Montana, Wizards of Waverly Place, or Zack and Cody. I also am feeling convicted to set the example, I know I am personally guilty of spending alot of time in front of the computer. I am challenging myself to limit this time to work hours, and occasionally after the kids are in bed. I don't want them feeling like they have to compete with the computer to get my attention, I would not want to compete for theirs.
So, I ask for your prayers as we transition into this new set of rules. I'm so excited for the opportunities it is going to bring us as a family unit. Pray for Richard and I to stay firm in our decision. Pray for Brian and Rachel as they develop new habits and find new ways to entertain themselves, and also for our time together as a family to be blessed and fruitful. I pray that we rediscover ourselves as a family and as individuals, uninfluenced by fictitious characters and things conveyed to be the norm. I want us to set the standard in our home based on God and our beliefs in the life He wants for us, not worldly desires and standards.
